Beyond ‘Lord, Lord’: Building a Real Relationship with the God Who Longs to Know You

And this is eternal life, that they know you,

the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.

(John 17:3, ESV)

When my babies were born, I remember looking at them as a wrapped present. I thought I’d feel like they were unwrapped after waiting more than nine months to see them (all my babies were late). But as they lay in their bassinets, they were still little mysteries. I knew what they looked like and sounded like, but I didn’t know who they would become, what they would like and dislike, and what kind of personality would unfold as they grew. I began a relationship with each of them on the day they were born, but I didn’t get to know them except with time.

Our relationship with God is similar. We learn we need a Savior, and hopefully in that moment, we open our hearts to Jesus and choose to accept his forgiveness, new life, and choose to follow him all our lives. In that moment, we begin a relationship with him, but we spend a lifetime learning to know him and his ways.

One of the scariest passages in the Bible is Matthew  7:21-23:

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven,

but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.

On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy

in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty

works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; 

depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’”

At first, we may be the same as those saying, “But wait, didn’t we do ministry in your name? What do you mean you don’t know me?” This is the danger we talked about in last week’s blog post. If we focus on right behavior only, or we think that just saying words in a prayer guarantee that we are saved, we can be sadly mistaken. Last week we talked about how our walk with God must be based on our hearts, not just outward behavior. Today, we are reiterating that and looking at obedience and relationship.

Think about any relationship you have that means anything to you: in a relationship, we talk to one another, wait on one another, and listen to one another. The other person is important to us, and their feelings and dreams matter to us. We make time for the other person. We love and respect the other person. We are happy to serve them and help them. When we pick up the phone, we recognize their voice on the other end. When we are far from them, we miss them.

Now, think about your relationship with God. Does it follow the same pattern? It may seem simplistic, but this is a way we can also help our children evaluate their relationship with God. Did they pray a prayer because their friend prayed a prayer? Did they say and do what they thought we wanted them to do? Or is their faith their own, and is it a genuine relationship with God?

We can only judge our own hearts with the help of the Holy Spirit. We can teach our children to do the same. Our hearts are deceitful, and I am always amazed at how we can justify just about anything (Jeremiah 17:9). We want the Holy Spirit to reveal the truth to us and bring our hearts into agreement with God and his Word (John 16:13; Romans 8:27; 1 Corinthians 2:10).

Daily Practices for Knowing God:

We know God more as we pray regularly, not just asking for things, but waiting, listening, and conversing with God in prayer.

Reading Scripture allows us to know God, his character, his ways, and his voice. Reading Scripture is a vital part of knowing God.

We can even know God more as we gain an appreciation for his creation and spend time thinking of him and thanking him while we are in nature. We can see God’s attributes displayed through his creation.

Learning God’s Voice:

John 10:27 tells us we will know God’s voice and follow him. We recognize God’s voice just like we would a friend’s voice or family member’s voice: by being familiar with it. We become familiar with God’s voice as we read the Bible. It is literally God’s Word. We also become more familiar with his voice as we listen to wise counsel from mature believers, recognize circumstances that align with his character, and through the inner witness of the Holy Spirit in our lives.

Practical Self-Examination Questions:

Consider some questions we can ask ourselves and encourage our children to use when they may doubt their relationship with God such as:

>Do I find myself wanting to spend time with God, or does it feel like obligation?

>When I face decisions, do I naturally turn to God for guidance?

>Am I growing in love for what God loves and grief over what grieves Him?

>Do I see evidence of the fruit of the Spirit developing in my life over time?

Community and Accountability:

Another way we can feel more secure in our relationship with God is by getting involved in Christian community and fellowship. We need accountability. Others may see the blind spots in our lives that we miss. We need to find a community of believers whom we trust and love. We will encourage each other’s growth in faith.

Bearing Fruit:

Finally, we can see our faith through the fruit growing in our lives. This goes back to the question of seeing evidence of the fruit of the Spirit in our lives. Sometimes, we think like those who did not know God who did all the religious activities in their own strength. However, true fruit is a changed character, a renewed heart, and a life of obedience to God’s Word and ways. That’s the fruit we need to see in our lives. The ministry grows out of that as the Holy Spirit leads and guides us to do the work he has for us.

Knowing God is both a moment and a lifetime—a relationship that begins with surrender and deepens through the daily choice to seek His face, listen for His voice, and allow His Spirit to transform us from the inside out. When we pursue God with genuine hearts, seeking to know Him rather than simply know about Him, we can rest in the beautiful assurance that He knows us completely and calls us His own. And we, as beloved children, cry out ‘Abba, Father!’ with confidence and joy.

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive

the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit

of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit himself

bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children,

then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer

with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

(Romans 8:14-17, ESV)